Rant #2,425: The Impossible Dream

I frequent fast food restaurants on occasion.

I don't listen to the hype about how terrible these places are for your mental and physical health, and I go to them if I need a quick meal--usually dinner--and I am on the run.

With my current lifestyle, I eat fast food probably three times a week.

During the workweek, I have an occasion where I have to eat fast food one day during the week when I take my son to his therapist. It simply makes things easier for me, and sure, I would prefer to eat at home, but I simply can't do that this one day during the workweek, because if I did, I would eat around 8 p.m., which is way too late, no matter what you are eating.

And then on the weekend, I don't want my wife to cook anything, so I go out for her and my son and I get something--usually not fast food for her, but certainly for my son and myself.

Knock me if you want, but that is the way my life is going right now, and fast food fits right into that lifestyle, for me and millions of others who go against current supposed wisdom and eat this stuff to our heart's content.

Anyway, the point that I am getting at is that if one so chooses to eat fast food, there are, of course, numerous choices as for the type of fare you want, everything from hamburgers and franks to fish and chicken, and seemingly everything in between.

Since we are supposedly such a health-conscious culture--I don't believe that for one minute, but the hype pretty much exceeds the actual need, except by millennials, who have their thinking done by them by factions other than their own brains--fast food places have adapted to what their customers want, and their customers evidently want healthier fare, which goes against one of the basic tenets of fast food, to deliver quick meals that aren't necessarily healthy, but fill the need.

So you are seeing more salads on menus, more food that is locally and organically grown, and all that it really does is that it expands the menu so that people who wouldn't necessarily down a hamburger still won't, but they will accompany their party to the restaurant, and will have their own options that fit their needs.

Yesterday, Burger King unveiled its new Impossible Whopper, which is a plant-based burger with lower calories and fat than a regular hamburger that is squeezed into a traditional Whopper costume, meaning that you have the no-meat burger surrounded by the usual onions, pickles, ketchup, and bun, and if you would like, cheese and bacon too.

The fast food chain had tried out the non-meat burger at several locations around the country, liked what they heard, and now for a limited time, it was rolled out to all chain restaurants in the U.S. at about 11:00 a.m.-11:30 a.m. yesterday.

They are the first large chain to pick up and roll out an item nationwide from Impossible Foods, a food startup making a splash by creating non-meat items that taste like the real thing.

And it is also grilled like the real thing. Burger King is also quick to say that the Impossible Burger is grilled on the same burners as its regular beef hamburgers and chicken are, so the twain does kind of meet in the middle with this offering.

Anyway, yesterday night being the time of day I have to take my son to his therapist, I decided that it was good a day as any to try out the Impossible Whopper, so that is exactly what I did.

I had one without cheese, and without bacon, just to see what the basic sandwich tasted like without all of those fixins--but with the lettuce and tomato and onions and pickles on it.

Let me backtrack a bit--a number of years ago, one of the fast food places came out with a burger made out of some other non-meat ingredient, and I tried it, and it was horrible. Not only did it have an aftertaste, but it tasted absolutely nothing like a real meat burger. I think it was made out of seaweed, and it in fact tasted just like a burger made out of seaweed.

Yuck!

So I went into this current experience with trepidation. Would I be disappointed, or would I find that I actually liked what I was eating? I usually don't like substitutes--no diet cola for me!

Into my mouth the Impossible Whopper went, and the first thing that I tasted was the ketchup and pickles and onions and lettuce, which kind of masked whatever type of meat--real or otherwise--that I was eating.

Once I got past that, I did actually taste the burger, and you can tell that something has been added to it to give it somewhat of a flame-broiled taste, somewhat near a real hamburger but not quite there.

I didn't not like it--double negatives aside--but alas, it is definitely not a real hamburger in any way, shape or form.

But it wasn't terrible, like the seaweed hamburger was all those years ago. It did not leave an aftertaste, and went well with the fries and drink I had.

So on a scale of 1 to 10, with one being the worst and 10 being the best, I would honestly give the burger a 6.5. It really replicated the real hamburger quite a bit, even though at the end of the meal, it doesn't leave you very full. You could eat two or three of those before you felt you had eaten something worth the money--near $6 if bought apart from the meal--but again, it did not leave any aftertaste.

So would I buy it again? Impossibly, yes I would. It was not terrible, it certainly got a passing grade from me, and I think it needs further inspection by me as to whether something like this could be part of my future orders at the fast food restaurant.

Now, on to the tacos ...

I have to take the morning off on Monday to do some responsibilities that I have, so I will not be here on Monday, but you can find me back here on Tuesday, all revved up and ready to go.

Speak to again on the second day of the workweek. Have a good weekend!

Belch!