Rant #1,377: Park Yer Carcass

There has been some disturbing news about parking cars this week, a task so rudimentary, but at the same time, oh, so frustrating.

We have all read about that nut that decided to take out three people with a gun because, he claims, he was arguing over a parking spot.

The three people he removed from the earth just happen to be Muslim, the current chosen people of this land, and that makes the situation one where it has to be asked if this was a hate crime or not.

The guy with the gun seems to be a nut, one who would be the perfect candidate for membership in the local Aryan Nation chapter, so I would have to say that at least on the surface, he probably got even more riled up than he normally would over a parking space because these people were Muslim, again, the chosen people of our land as I write this.

Not that these people deserved to die over a parking spot, but let's face it, having your parking spot taken away from you is one of the worst things that happen to normal people, and this shooter was far from normal, so the circumstance was one that unfortunately produced three deaths.

I am not going to liken my situation to this one, although it has befuddled all of us at one time or another. Whether it is a space in front of our home, our designated parking space, or a space at the local mall, we have all gotten nuts over losing out at a parking space.

It makes us genuinely upset when our space is taken, or we miss out on a space during a busy shopping day.

It has happened to every driver who has a license, and probably to those who drive without a license too.

Just now, I have somebody parked in my parking place in front of my home.

We have had minor disputes with neighbors during the past decades about where they park.

For some reason, on my block, which is a very small one, people park wherever they want to, oftentimes not in front of their own homes.

I remember years ago, the people across the street from us consistently parked in my sister's space. Why they did not park in front of their own home was beyond us.

So, my sister did what was right; she parked smack dab in front of their house.

After a few times, they got the message, and didn't park in front of our home anymore.

We have a situation today where the homeowner across the street is an absentee landlord, and he illegally rents out his home to at least two people leasing the property.

They park all over the place.

When the homeowner was living there, I asked him nicely, to his face, not to park in front of my house in my spot. I asked him why he would do that if he had plenty of room to park in front of his own home.

He was nasty, threatened me, the whole nine yards.

Now, he is renting out his house, and one of his tenants, off an on, parks right in my space--I believe it is one of his tenants, because I don't know where else the car could have come from.

At least I can park behind him this time. Other times, my mother's car is parked behind him, so there is nowhere for me to park and I have to park in front of someone else's home, which, as you can understand from what I have just written, I don't like to do.

Sure, I do not own the street, and it is not against the law to park wherever you want, but the fact of the matter is that it is the neighborly thing to do to park in front of your own dwelling. And to add insult to injury, if we have a major snow this weekend, I will be parked in my driveway, but this guy will be parked in my spot, and the snow will bury this guy, and I won't have may space for awhile, nor will it be cleaned correctly.

So here is my open letter to this parker, who is upsetting me with his cavalier parking habits. No, I won't go ballistic like that other idiot; I will do my bidding a bit more politely.

Dear Neighbor:
It has come to my attention that every once in a while, you park in front of my home in the spot I have been parking in for more than 40 years.

There is parking elsewhere on our street, and I am asking you to park in front of your own dwelling.

Yes, I do not own the street, but with limited parking spaces on our small street, it is the neighborly thing to do.

I am sure you will understand the situation, and I hope that this short note clears everything up for you about where you should be parking your car.

Thanks for understanding.

Your Neighbor

(No Rant on Monday, as I am taking the day off for President's Day. Also, have a nice Valentine's Day. Speak to you again on Tuesday.)