Rant #2,213: Cold Sweat

It is August 30, and I am one day closer to my vacation.

It is steamy in the New York Metropolitan area--yesterday reached into the high 90s--and today also promises to be steamy, getting in the high 80s before the weather forecasters promise us a cool down for Friday, when it is only supposed to get into the 70s.

Good. I am one of those people who simply cannot take the heat.

I have always been that way as far back as I can remember.

I am a true child of air conditioning.

My mother tells me that when I was a baby, I would not sleep in the house, probably because it was too hot for me.

But take me outside in the carriage, and I was a happy little boy, and I would sleep the day away.

Even as I got older, I hated the heat, but somehow, through my young years, I got through it all without air conditioning.

But I probably didn't sleep that well even back then because if you mix the heat with my allergies--which weren't diagnosed officially until I was about 15 years of age or so--you can only imagine what I put my parents through, particularly in the evening, when I was supposed to be fast asleep.

Then came the Rochdale Village years ... we moved to this brand new development in 1964, when I was seven years old, and we had a new toy to use in our brand new apartment--air conditioning, which was in our bedrooms and throughout our dwelling.

And you can bet that it was used all the time during the warmer months, and maybe for the first time in my young life, I was cool and happy.

We lived there until 1971, and when I was 14, we moved to the wilds of Long Island.

The house my parents purchased had no air conditioning, and after moving in in July 1971--during the height of that year's summer--I must have gotten sick, and my pediatrician--who still made house calls at that time--not only told my mother, but implored her to put an air conditioner in my room.

One was purchased, and for a while, my room was the only air conditioned room in the house.

Thank you, Dr. Geller, you might have saved my life, or at least you made me feel more comfortable.

Since then, every summer, the air conditioner goes on when I am in my dwelling, period.

We start using the air conditioner oftentimes in April, but we really pick it up as May goes into June, and the weather starts to get really warm.

We hold off as much as we can, but sometimes, my wife and I go to sleep without it on, and then in the middle of the night, I end up putting it on myself.

She is not an air conditioner person, but there are even times that she will implore me to put the air conditioner on.

Not only does it provide us some comfort, but it also provides a nice whirring sound to go to sleep to.

And yes, my son has an air conditioner in his room, my daughter had one in her room--it never worked right, for some reason, but is still in her old room--and our living room has a big one, which can cool off the entire house.

I remember a time when air conditioners in cars was not a given, but in today's world, it is a standard piece of equipment in every car on the road.

However, I don't use it much during the week, because I am in bumper to bumper traffic coming home, and I am old fashioned, believing the car will overheat if I use the air conditioning if we are only barely moving.

I know, new car air conditioners can withstand such tumult better than they used to, but I still remember some years ago, when I was driving my mother's car for some reason, and the air conditioner literally just popped--it made a popping sound like a firecracker going off--and it was never to be heard from again.

Air conditioning has been around since the early 1900s. In 1902, Willis Carrier designed the first air conditioning system, and it was used in office buildings and larger gathering places through the 1950s.

During the 1960s, it started to turn up in houses and apartments as the price for air conditioning plummeted.

Even in today's world, many people do not have air conditioning in their homes. They either don't want it, the dwelling does not come with it, or they feel they simply cannot afford it.

Me, I firmly believe that with my allergies and just my typical body the way it is, if I lived a century earlier, well, quite frankly, I probably would not have reached my 61st birthday without air conditioning to cool me down and make me feel better.

Even now, sometimes I need more than air conditioning to cool me down. At work, I also use a small desk fan to cool me down, and yes, it works.

I have had other people complain about how warm it is at work--and yes, it is, they don't pour on the air conditioner there--so since I don't feel too bad, I know the combination of air conditioning and the fan serves me well.

So thank you to four people--Dr. Geller, Willis Carrier, and of course, may parents--for helping me feel comfortable and giving me the ability to breathe.

It is simply no fun being hot.