Classic Rant #441 (February 9, 2011): Lindsay! Lindsay! Lindsay!

Here we go again.

Lindsay Lohan will be charged with felony grand theft in connection with a $2,500 necklace that was removed from a jewelry store.

Evidently, on Jan. 22, a necklace was borrowed for Lohan by her assistant, but her assistant--or Lohan herself--was late in returning it. It is supposedly a one-of-a-kind piece of jewelry, making the lateness even more of a big deal.

Although the necklace reportedly has since been returned, the actress will be arraigned later today. She has agreed to turn herself in to avoid the paparazzi.

If convicted, this would be a clear violation of her probation, and she could get up to two years in the slammer, although experts state that this cold be whittled down to three to six months.

Incredible.

It is clear that we are seeing a starlet self destruct right before our eyes. It is kind of sad, but she has had numerous chances to redeem herself--including her latest probation--and she seems to explode right when you think that things are possibly looking up for her.

No one wishes ill will on her, but hey, she brings this type of behavior onto herself, doesn't she?

She--and for that matter, her entire family--believe they live in a different world from the rest of us. They believe that because of Lindsay's stardom, they deserve certain life perks that "normal" people don't get.

Well, if the escapades of Lindsay haven't brought them down to earth, then nothing will.

This is a girl whose life is completely out of control. She probably needs a mental institution more than a jail cell.

But the media uses her as a "toy" for their own exploitation, because she is young, good looking, has a nice figure, and because she is so "out there" with her behavior.

Look at the photo of her that I posted with this rant. I guess I am not immune to the lure of this pretty, um, demented, young lass.

I guess us "normal" people love to hear about her exploits.

But in this most recent episode, couldn't she have afforded to simply buy the necklace rather than pilfer it?

You might say yes, but she has been known to "adopt" things as her own.

There was an incident about two or three years back where she went to a club and took someone's jacket and refused to give it back. That made some headlines, but of course, it was covered over in the "I thought it was mine" defense.

I wonder what her defense will be this time?

"I am a stupid human being."

Nah, I doubt it, I really do.

She will paint herself as the victim, as she always does.

My question: Has she ever heard of the story about the boy who cried wolf? He did it so many times that when he really was being truthful, no one believed him.

Well, I think Ms. Lohan has reached that point, don't you?