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Friday, July 10, 2015

Classic Rant #120 (October 28, 2009): I Would Do Anything For World Series Tickets (Well, Almost Anything)



As a die-hard Yankees fan, I would love to be at Yankee Stadium for the first game of the 2009 World Series tonight.

But I don't have a ticket.

Nor do I know anyone who has an extra ticket.

In my case, I would love to take my family to the game. My daughter is away at school, so that means I need three tickets. I will even sit in nose-bleed seats; it doesn't really matter.

However slim my chances of getting World Series tickets, I won't stoop to the low that Susan Finkelstein dropped down to in her attempt to get tickets.

This die-hard Phillies fan allegedly offered sexual favors in order to score some tickets.

She posted on Craigslist--another site to hate for me--and said the following:

"Diehard Phillies fan — gorgeous tall buxom blonde — in desperate need of two World Series tickets. Price negotiable — I’m the creative type! Maybe we can help each other! S."

Well, a cop went undercover to find out just what she meant. He said he had one ticket, and that he knew another cop who had a ticket. The curvaceous blonde (well, at least according to her ad she is) said that if she could get his ticket, she would take care of him too.

The cop sprung into action, and arrested Finkelstein for prostitution.

By the way, I have relatives with the same last name, but this Finkelstein is not one of them.

Anyway, I still want tickets, but I am not a curvaceous blonde offering any gratuities in exchange for the tickets.

I just want tickets.

Is saying "Please" enough?

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