Rant #2,799: Fun, Fun, Fun

How was your Christmas weekend?
 
Mine was pretty quiet, which was a good thing.
 
I needed some quiet in my life … too much else going on, stuff that I would really like to resolve by year’s end but somehow, I think will proceed without end into the new year.
 
My one highlight was atypical for me right now, as I constantly do what I believe to be the right thing and it somehow turns out wrong.
 
Each morning, my wife and I empty the dishwasher, basically meaning that whoever gets up from bed first has the pleasure of putting the newly clean dishes and cups and other stuff away.
 
Yesterday, it was my turn, so I put the stuff away as I normally do.
 
I came to a coffee cup, I believe it was, and I opened up the cupboard to put it away.
 
As I opened the door to put the cup away, another cup--not the one pictured--came bounding out of the cupboard, a larger coffee cup, one that you can probably also use to have soup in.
 
It cascaded out of the cupboard, hit the ledge of the counter below it, and plowed right into my groin before it fell to the floor intact and not broken.
 
But as any male knows, a kick to the groin isn’t a pleasant experience, and when it hit me, I nearly fell to the floor myself, grabbing onto a nearby chair so I wouldn’t plummet to the ground in pain.
 
And yes, pain I had for a part of the day, but happily, it has subsided.
 
First time I was ever attacked by a coffee cup … maybe it is because the coffee gods got to me because I don’t like coffee.
 
Something to ponder … .
 
But at least I don’t have COVID.
 
My sister had her birthday yesterday, and celebrated it by nursing her second bout with COVID.
 
You might remember that last year, she had it during the virus’ first wave, and she got it so bad that she was really one step away from being hospitalized.
 
Anyway, the way it worked back then is that she got it from her youngest son, who passed it onto her husband, who passed it onto her.
 
This time, her youngest son got it again, and bypassed his father and infected his mom.
 
And yes, they are fully “vaccinated,” or more accurately, they are fully inoculated.
 
So hurling in my groin and hurting for my sister on her birthday, I didn’t have too much to do yesterday afternoon, and what way to soothe such hurts than to watch a Yoko Ono movie?
 
Yes, that is exactly what I did, finally finding a film that I had wanted to see out of curiosity and nothing more.
 
1965’s “Satan’ Bed” is one of those “roughies” features that were made in New York City in the 1960s, low-budget, non-studio movies that really pushed the envelope of what movies could show and subjects that they could cover at the time.

 
Using the backdrop of Manhattan in the mid 1960s, “Satan’s Bed" features everything from nudity to lots of violence to even same sex situations, never showing very much but just enough, and it is just such a terrible amalgam of all of these things that it is almost plotless, but never dull, forcing you to watch to see how terrible the films next scene will be.
 
Evidently putting two separate movies together into one, Ono stars as a woman who knows little English who somehow gets together with some type of American government agent who has one foot in the law, the other foot in dealing drugs.

 
He loves his new wife, and wants to give up the drug dealing, but in the course of trying to do that, he puts his wife in great danger, and she ends up getting attacked and abused and …
 
No, it makes no sense at all.
 
But pair this up with a totally separate story about three hoods—one, a shapely woman who likes girls—who rape and pillage to get drug money that they need for their habit, and well once again ….
 
Nothing makes much sense in this movie at all, but from a male perspective, you do see some nice looking women—including Ono, who is just so young here that you can’t believe that three years later, she would become internationally famous as she hooked up with John Lennon.

 
Well, at this time in 1965, Ono was a burgeoning “artiste,” but even artistes have to eat, I guess.
 
So that was my rollicking weekend … getting hit in the groin with a coffee cup, finding out that my sister celebrated her birthday by getting a case of COVID, and watching a Yoko Ono flick.
 
Yes, 2022 is looking good, isn’t it?