Rant #2,790: Spread It On Thick

Temp Tee.
 
The mention of those two words is music to my palette, and for most New Yorkers of every stripe, you just know exactly what I mean.
 
It is so much a part of the breakfasts of so many of us New Yorkers, and it even conjures up good memories if you once lived in this area and remember your breakfasts of yore.
 
I am talking about, of course, Temp Tee Whipped Cream Cheese, a true delicacy for the common man—and woman—which puts anything you spread it on onto another plane of taste.
 
If you have a bagel—and I mean a real bagel, not one of those supermarket-bought frozen ones—and you spread Temp Tee across it, you have entered food heaven once you put the bagel in your mouth and eat it.
 
It just elevates the bagel to another level, another sphere, another way of consumption.
 
It just is soooooo good, and goes with a bagel like butter goes to bread.
 
And on matzoh during Passover …
 
Here is what I had to say about Temp Tee in Rant #2,114, April 2, 2018:
 
“You have not lived until you have matzoh shmeared with Temp Tee Cream Cheese.
 
No, sorry, Philadelphia Cream Cheese just won't do on matzoh during Passover, and I don't think it is Kosher for Passover like Temp Tee is.
 
Anyway, you have matzoh and Temp Tee Cream Cheese for breakfast on Passover mornings, and you really are in breakfast heaven.
 
It just goes so good with a glass of milk.
 
Temp Tee is made by Breakstone--famous for its cottage cheese--and it is one of those uniquely New York food items that is so akin to the population here, one of the few foods that has pretty much kept its regional status although it is known probably throughout the country.”
 
The reason that I am pontificating about Temp Tee Cream Cheese is that it is getting harder and harder to find in your local supermarkets, as is cream cheese in general at your local bagel store or deli.
 
It is all supposedly part of this supply chain mess that we are in now, where products of every shape and size—including food products—are being held up because they can’t get through that chain.
 
There are a number of reasons that the supply chain is stopped up like a backed-up toilet right now, but none of it makes much sense to me.
 
All I want is my Temp Tee Cream Cheese.
 
I have to tell you, I went from one supermarket to another over the past few weeks, and I could not find it anywhere.
 
Even more distressing was that I could not find much cream cheese at all at many of these supermarkets.
 
One store I went to had a single, solitary store branded tub of cream cheese, low-fat and without salt, which is probably why it was the "Old Maid" of cream cheese in that store.
 
Other stores I went to had a few of the store-branded cream cheeses, but nothing else.
 
And still other stores had store brands and Philadelphia Cream Cheese—which is nowhere near as good as Temp Tee is—but nothing else.
 
I was getting frustrated, and several weeks ago, I even bought a store-branded cream cheese because there was nothing else I could do.
 
And then this weekend, I went to the supermarket with my mother as I always do on Sunday morning, and when we finally got to the chill section, all I saw was Philadelphia Cream Cheese and some store-branded tubs …
 
But leave it to my mother to take care of her totolla.
 
She alerted me that mixed in with the other cream cheeses was a tub or two of Temp Tee!
 
I grabbed one, and I was a happy guy!
 
There have been news reports that local bagel shops and delis have been hit by the cream cheese shortage, and where they used to bring in pounds of cream cheese each day, they are now lucky to get in pints of the stuff.
 
Some have even resorted to going to nearby supermarkets and buying, like you and I, what they can find.
 
So in many places, the “shmear” has gone out of the cream cheese on the bagel, and that sad, because that shmear is as New York as the Yankees are.
 
But at least for now, I have my Temp Tee Cream Cheese.
 
There simply is no substitute.
 
Heck, I guess that is why the competitor calls itself “Philadelphia” Cream Cheese.
 
You just can’t beat New York’s own, and Temp Tee pretty much translates to “New York” in my book.
 
You don’t have to say it or think it.
 
You just have to eat it, and you’ll know.