Classic Rant #409 (December 21, 2010): Electric Larryland

Let me just start off by saying that I have my computer back home from the shop. The technician swears that all I need is a new monitor, and I bought one last night. I came home late, so I didn't hook anything up. I will try to do it tonight. Hopefully, this computer nightmare will be over and done with.

Let's move on. I read in the local newspaper here that the Long Island Power Authority, the local authority which supplies power to Long Island residents and businesses, is offering a $500 rebate on plug-in cars. LIPA said the amount is equivalent to the cost of charging a plug-in electric vehicle for one year or the cost of the optional 240-volt charging station that cuts what could be a 10-hour charging time to about four hours. The rebate will be available until the end of 2011.

That is all fine and good. We should be moving toward purchasing hybrid or electric-only cars to cut our fuel consumption. With gas prices rapidly nearing the $4 mark, anything we can do to save a little money is good.

And yes, political correct police, it helps the environment too.

But wait a minute.

The car manufacturers--many of whom pleaded poverty a year ago--don't appear to be on the same page with the rest of us.

Yes, they are manufacturing such vehicles, but they are pricing them well beyond the reach of the average consumer.

Look at the new Volt, which recently debuted with a big splash as the future of these types of cars. This vehicle, unlike the similarly vaunted Prius, uses plug-in rechargeable batteries running two electric motors. It also comes with a gas engine.

However, it is priced at $41,000, and that is for a car that is pretty much a box with wheels. When you add up all of your costs, the car probably costs about $50,000, or what the gas-eating Hummer used to cost.

Sure, you get a tax rebate and you will save on gas usage, but I don't know if I want to saddle myself with such a huge bill for a car that might last five years or so.

When I was looking for a car two-and-a-half years ago, I really wanted a hybrid, but their prices were well beyond what I wanted to pay. I can't see paying more than $30,000 for a car whose technology has yet to be perfected.

Sure, there are people on this planet who can well afford such cars. Hollywood royalty, such as Leonardo DiCaprio, have told us for years that we should buy hybrids and electric cars to save our environment.

Sorry, Leo, I don't make $20 million a movie like you do, so I simply can't afford this new technology.

I have to drive around with your standard family car, which cost me maybe $20,000 or in that range, and which gets me 24 miles a gallon.

Again, it's nice that the car companies are coming out with such cars--others are supposed to debut in 2011, like the Leaf--but until they are priced affordably, your standard middle class worker making $40,000 or more is not going to go for them.

We will save on gas, but we will bankrupt ourselves in the process.

Rant #1,754: 1966

Boy, television was so much better 50 years ago than it is today.

Even with less choice, we had so many good choices to make back then.

As I did last week, I want to look back at TV 50 years ago, and tell you about two TV shows that debuted on yesterday's date, 50 years ago to the day.

One was one of the most popular sitcoms of the day, the other was a short-lived musical comedy that was highly influential, and is highly influential to this day.

"Family Affair" starred Brian Keith as Bill Davis, a playboy character, hot with the girls, and also very wealthy, traveling around the world to ply his trade as a civil engineer. He was so wealthy that he had his own butler, Mr. French, played to perfection by Sebastian Cabot.

Due to deaths in his family--I believe it was his brother and sister-in-law in a car accident--Keith inherited his two nieces and one nephew from a group of other relatives who did not want to care for them anymore, and all of a sudden, his life was turned upside down, and not only his life--and this is really what made the show so interesting--but the life of breakout character Mr. French.

The three kids on the show--Kathy Garver, Anissa Jones and Johnny Whitaker--were your All-American kids, thrown into a tough situation, but somehow, they, their uncle and Mr. French all managed to get along for five very good seasons on CBS.

Developed by the same people who did "My Three Sons," the show often fell into the dramedy range--making it one of the first shows of this kind--but there were always some light chuckles to keep things moving.

The show was so successful that it had its own spinoff, "To Rome With Love" that lasted a few seasons, and the term "Uncle Bill!" became part of the country's lexicon, as did the presence of Mrs. Beasley, the weird looking doll on the show, during "Family Affair's" run.

Yesterday was a Monday night, and 50 years ago, it was a Monday night, too, and if you were in the Eastern time zone, at 7:30 p.m., and you were between five and about 12 years old in 1966, you were probably watching the premiere of "The Monkees" on NBC.

The show, the brainchild of Bert Schneider and Bob Rafelson--two guys who used the show as a springboard to enter into the movies, including "Five Easy Pieces" and "Easy Rider"- actually stemmed from an idea which had bumped around for a few years prior to 1966.

First, the show was going to be about a folk group, then when rock and roll was really becoming center stage, a real group was considered as the leads, including Jan and Dean and the Lovin' Spoonful.

When the Beatles hit, that was the direction that the show took, trying to "ape" the Fab Four's success on the small screen.

Through endless open auditions and screen tests, four young actors/musicians were chosen amongst hundreds of applicants--Michael Nesmith, Davy Jones, Micky Dolenz, and Peter Tork.

And with that, the foursome were the stars of a situation comedy about four struggling musicians, living in a Malibu beach house, and all the complications that followed them as they tried to become stars.

With the best songwriters contributing music to the show, "The Monkees" TV show was never a huge hit ratings-wise, but on the record charts, the foursome had three number one records, numerous other hit singles and albums, and were among the largest record sellers of the day.

Although the show lasted just two years, its influence is still being felt today. It laid the groundwork, at least partially, for everything from MTV to "American Idol," from the way rock groups are marketed to how they are perceived by the public, and the group has toured off and on literally since their formation to this day, with their popularity once again solidified with a very successful new album and concert tour this year, celebrating 50 years of success.

So there you have it.

Two more TV shows debuting in 1966 that continue to be popular, and influential, 50 years later.

Who would have believed that these shows would be so important way back when?

Classic Rant #408 (December 20, 2010): Time To End It All

No, my computer is still not working correctly. And yes, I am writing this on an outside unit.

Everything was fine, I was using it without any problem, and I was hooking up to the Internet just fine on Friday night.

But on Saturday, there were some strange images on the screen, and then, nothing. I tried another monitor, and it once again crapped out on me pretty quickly.

I brought the unit in for repair on Sunday, and they later told me it might be the monitor. Funny, I tried another monitor I had, and it didn't work either. Maybe it's the video card?

Whatever the reason, they are keeping my unit overnight, and perhaps they will find out the problem.

Right now, I am ready to tear out the remaining hairs on my head, which don't number many.

I told my wife that I feel like I have been born under a bad sign when it comes to electronics. I always seem to have problems with them.

This dates back to when I was a teenager, and I got my driver's license. In my early cars, my radio either didn't play or didn't play very well.

In the old days, I can't tell you how many tapes I got stuck in my car tape player.

Also, later on, my stereos always played, or didn't play right. They were adequate, but never really that great.

I have had countless TVs--I was nearly electrocuted by one when lightning hit our roof antenna, frying my TV right after I had manually turned the channel--stereos, computers, VCRs and other electronics, and they all go bad on me.

The latest cycle started in October, when we had a brief power outage and my video recorder died due to the rapid power deflation--and then power surge--brought on by this outage. Luckily, I had a spare one around, so it was relatively easy to switch them.

Later, I bought my mother an inexpensive computer, only to find that its operating system was antiquated, and I couldn't hook up to the Internet.

Over Thanksgiving, I blew out a part of our electrical system when I hooked up a battery charger to one of our wall outlets.

And then we come to this computer, the latest episode of which has driven me nearly to drink.

By the way, my son received a new iPod for the holiday, and yesterday we decided to get it in sync with his computer.

Of course, based on my luck, there were problems.

It took about 45 minutes for the new version of iTunes to download. Heaven knows why, I have downloaded other versions of iTunes in the past, and it takes maybe five minutes, at most, to do.

Then, the songs he selected wouldn't go into the newly installed iTunes. I have no idea why, but somehow, we were able to fix this problem. In fact, the whole thing works pretty well now.

Anyway, I still yearn for the day that the only thing we had to worry about was if the rabbit ears on our TV were in the right position to pick up our local stations.

Frankly, I can't take anymore of this nonsense.

But what am I to do?

It is time to end it all--I mean all the computer/electronics problems, nothing else--and get back to normal living.

Believe me, I am trying.

Let's see what happens with my computer so I can get back to some type of normalcy.

That would be the greatest present I can get this holiday season.

Rant #1,753: New-Monia

It came out over the weekend that Hillary Clinton has pneumonia.

She has experienced some bad health days in recent weeks, nearly passed out at the 9/11 Memorial event, and then she finally got checked out, and this is what the doctors said she had.

I wish her a speedy recovery.

But I am going to tell you now, at her age, she has to be very careful with pneumonia, and her recovery will actually take months.

Based on the severity of what she has, the doctors will tell her that she has to have complete rest for several weeks, that she must follow a regimen of exercise, diet and yes, again, rest, and that she should be in bed, at least for the first couple of weeks after being diagnosed with the disease.

Kind of hard to do when you are supposedly campaigning for President of the United States.

But the alternative can be deadly, so she will pretty much have no choice in the matter.

I know all about this because her being diagnosed with pneumonia coincides with my father going back to work after several months recovery from pneumonia.

He goes back to being a New York City licensed medallion cab driver today, and has actually already gone back, as he starts his day early, about 1 a.m., so as I look at the clock, he has been back to work for about three and a half hours as I write this.

Let me tell you, the recovery was slow, but by paying 1,000 percent attention to the regimen that was prescribed to him, it took him about three-plus months to recover enough to be able to have the strength to go back to work.

He hasn't kicked pneumonia entirely; it is still in his system, and will probably be there for a few months more.

But he has felt better for a couple of weeks, and the doctors game his the OK to go back to work.

Look, there is a difference between an 85 year old man handling pneumonia and a 69 year old woman handling pneumonia, and it is no fun having pneumonia at any age.

But once a person is 65 and older, getting pneumonia--which is an airborne virus, by the way, and anyone can get it--handling the recovery, and actually recovering from having the disease--can be problematic, in particular for active people, like my father and Clinton.

They basically have to learn to sit still, follow doctors' orders to the T, and just wind down a bit, mixed in with diet and moderate exercise.

That is the only way to kick this thing, and Clinton must do these things in her road to recovery.

It will only become a campaign issue if, 1) she does not follow what her doctor tells her; and/or 2) the pneumonia she has is a real nasty one, and doesn't go away so quick.

In the meantime, her vice presidential running mate, Tim Kaine, and her daughter and husband, can stump for her, and you can bet that they will do just that.

But pneumonia should not be taken lightly. Older people can actually die from the disease.

How she balances these health concerns alongside running for the commander in chief position is anyone's guess at this point, but if she is smart, now is the time to rest. There are still many days to the actual election, and by the time of election day, with the proper rest, she will be well on the road to recovery.

Whether she does that or not depends on HER, and her alone.

And as I write this, I wish the best to my father. He did what he was supposed to do, and now is well on the road, literally, to kicking this thing.

Whether Clinton will follow in his footsteps is something that will have to play itself out, but again, it is up to HER to do this.

Classic Rant #407 (December 17, 2010): DAMN!

Former WWE wrestler Ron Simmons' trademark was not a wrestling hold, it was his simple proclamation to the cameras when he found something that irritated him.

"DAMN" he would yell, and then the show moved onto something else.

Well, I can now channel Simmons and say the same thing about my recent computer woes.

My computer odyssey continues, but with a happy ending.

I left for work yesterday with the understanding that my home Internet was being thwarted by a faulty coaxial cable.

A technician was to come to my house and fix the situation today.

All was fine and good when I arrived home from work yesterday. I ate dinner, had time to speak to my wife and son, and decided that after I walked the dog, I would go and clean up around where I have my desktop computer, so that the technician could do his work with being impeded by my stuff.

Well, I walked into the room with the computer--it used to be my daughter's room, but she hasn't used it for quite a while--and I found that the light on the router signaling the Internet was on!

Yes, I put on the computer, and lo and behold, I got onto the Internet without a problem.

I quickly programmed the other computers in the house, and after a few false steps of my own--putting in the wrong key code--I now had every computer in the house hooked up to the Internet.

How did this come about? How did the situation change so dramatically in such a short time, a matter of hours?

I called my Internet provider today to cancel my service appointment. I told the person on the other line the whole story, and he said the solution was a simple one.

When hooking up a new router, there is some type of lag time between when you hook it up and when it allows you Internet access. According to him, it takes some time for the new router to authenticate all the various codes it needs to be able to provide Internet access, and that is probably why I couldn't access the Internet immediately the night before.

I thanked him and ended the call.

Now, my question is, why didn't the call I made to my service provider the night before yield such an explanation?

If the guy I spoke to would have told me there was some type of lag time, I would have shut down the computer and let it go for 24 hours.

Instead, I wasted more than two hours trying to find out the problem.

Heck, they even ran a diagnostic on my entire system, and they came to the conclusion that the coaxial cable was at fault.

That being said, the end result of this mess is that I am happy. I have home Internet access, and I seemingly don't have to worry about this anymore.

But of course, I am not going to count my chickens before they've hatched. I will monitor the situation each day to make sure that it really is fixed.

But I would have saved a lot of time--and prevented a lot of anxiety--if I would have been told the right story by my service provider.

And thanks to you out there too. You've had to put up with this talk of computer stuff for the past few days. Now I can move onto other things.

Let's see, what is Lindsay Lohan up to ... ?