Rant #4,018: No More Tears (Enough Is Enough)

Back to the cemetery ...

I went back there again yesterday to see if any progress had been made on making my mother's gravesite presentable--

And nothing had been done, even though we were told that something was going to be done quickly when my sister and I complained about it last week.

This time, it was not a holiday, so I went into the office, and complained.

I was told that my mother's gravesite--as well as many others--were ready for the planting season, and that her site would have bushes planted on it soon, but they could not give me a date.

After I enquired even further about why there were no bushes on the site to begin with, as there should have been, I kind of figured what they were going to say to me.

The person I spoke to said, "There is a question of payment."

"We never received a bill," I replied. "I will pay for it now, if you want me to."

The person said, "No, you don't have to pay for it now, just wait for the bushes to be planted again." 

I said, politely, that I don't want to cause a problem, but why were we not billed for all of this?

"Look, our post office is terrible. We sent the bill out, but you probably did not receive it."

"So can you email me the bill, or I can pay now."

"We are thinking about sending bills by email, because our post office is so terrible."

So where this stands now is, no, there are no bushes on the site.

I have been told that bushes will be planted during their planting season cycle, which is now, but the bushes won't be planted there possibly into October.

I was told that I would be notified by email when they are planted, and that they would contact me when payment was needed.

Why they didn't take my payment right then and there is beyond me, and this is now the third somewhat different story I have heard about why there are no bushes on my mom's gravesite.

I called my sister and told her all about it.

I don't trust this cemetery, to say the least, but what can I do?

I can't say I will take my business elsewhere, nor can I ask them to exhume the grave so I can bury my mother somewhere else.

This is a cemetery, and I have to trust that a mistake was made, and that it will be rectified soon.

I really wish I could have gotten there sooner, but again, not to excuse myself for not going to pay my respects to both my mother and father, but this has been a very, very rough year for me.

I do blame myself, but I also blame the cemetery, because there is no excuse for not contacting me about this.

If they did, in fact, send out a communication to me, I never received it, so since they have my phone and email address, they could have contacted me that way too, to make sure I received the message.

But, as usual, nothing goes smoothly when it comes to just about anything I do, so I have to go through extra layers to discern what is going on--

And to rectify it.

My mother deserves better.

Honestly, I just don't know what I did to anybody to deserve all of this, but if God is testing me ...

I hope that I have finally passed this latest test with flying colors.

Rant #4,017: Let Freedom Ring

The 25th anniversary of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks was a day of remorse ...

For some people, I guess.

New York City Mayor Mamdani and his cohorts attended the ceremony at Ground Zero, but by all accounts, they were there because they had to be there, not because they wanted to be there, as they were seen laughing during the reading of the names of the deceased.

Yes, there is often some laughter at funerals, because that is human nature, but based on what I have seen and what was reported, there were points that this garbage mayor and others were having a grand old time at the ceremony.

In fact, the mayor attended a march held beforehand that I had never heard of, one where marchers make their way to Ground Zero while stopping at churches, synagogues and mosques along the way so they can pay their religious respects to those who have perished.

Rather than marching all the way through, Mamdani only appeared at the mosque visit.

These incidents simply reinforce the fact that this guy is evil, what he stands for is evil--

And New York City deserves this garbage because they voted him into office.

Shame on all of them.

What did I do on Patriot's Day?

I worked.

I took my son to work, and brought him home when his workday was completed.

I saw some of the ceremonies.

I also did something that I had vowed to do for a while--

Nothing important in the grand scheme of things, but it was important for me, personally, that I get this chore done.

I worked to rearrange my 45 RPM singles collection using the two new holders I bought, originally to hold my CD collection, but now repurposed to hold singles.

Look, when you have 5,000 singles, it is quite a chore to do this, a lot of lifting, bending, and moving around.

It was time to do it, because once September 21 comes around and I have my eye operation, I can't do that stuff for at least a few weeks, if not a few months.

So I did it on September 11.

I moved everything, and while I don't feel that I am 100 percent done with the task, at least I have gotten off to a good start.

It will do for now.

In the early evening, it was the first night of Rosh Hashanah--the beginning of the Jewish High Holy Days---and while I did not attend shul then or over the weekend, I do hope for renewal--personal and otherwise--this new year.

I also watched baseball.

Baseball was thought to be a healing force during the aftermath of that horrid day, and 25 years later, the two New York baseball teams faced each other to signify the importance of the day, the importance of what happened in Manhattan that day, and the importance of our national pastime as an agent for healing. 

It was the Yankees versus the Mets, and I saw all the pre-game ceremonies unfurl, remembering the day 25 years ago.

Yankee Stadium was packed, and while there were Mets and Yankees fans there, fans of the U.S.A. eclipsed everything.

But we were brought back to the current normal--which is far from it--when a so-called "fan" ran onto the field and unfurled a Palestinian flag.

He ran out of the stands onto the field at exactly 9:11 p.m.

He was tackled and taken away.

Yes, most reports listed him as a "fan," once again showing their bias against the U.S. and Israel and yes, the free world.

His actions didn't ruin the game, but it also signified that there is a rancid boil that is festering in this country and around the world--

A lesion further inflamed by the likes of Mayor Mamdani and his evil, anti-U.S.A. minions.

It was September 11, 2026, not September 11, 2021, and yes, many of us seem to have collectively forgotten about what happened that day.

It is looked at as ancient history to some, but to others, that wound will never heal.

Some even say that Patriot's Day should be a national holiday, a day that we get off from school and work and honor those who died by the hands of terrorists.

We have to be really careful here.

We do not want the day to morph into a day that we go to the beach, have sales in our stores and online, have barbecues and take it easy, like we do on other holidays.

That would respect our American lifestyle that these terrorists tried to take away from us on that fateful day, but it would also disrespect those who gave the ultimate sacrifice.

So leave the day as it is, teach our children about the evils that happened that day, hold those responsible fully accountable for what they did, and make sure we are all on the same page when it comes to that day.

"U.S.A. ! ...

U.S.A. ! ...

U.S.A. ... !!!!!!!!

Rant #4,016: Live

Today, on the 25th anniversary of the 9/11 tragedy, I am going to rerun Rant #2,490, which ran on September 11, 2020, because it is still fresh, and it is one of the most important Rants I ever wrote.

Things are not what they once were pre-September 11, 2001, and they certainly are quite different than they are today.

Some look at this day as ancient history, as if we were talking about the Civil War or other conflicts in our nation's past.

Some scoff at it by voting into public office people who should be shunned for their beliefs and actions toward our country.

Some are just plain ignorant, and quite frankly, stupid, about this day and what it means to this country, and the world.

I am not the "some people" that I am talking about.

This day changed everything for us as a society and as a country, and it didn't change things for the better.

I have my own story to tell about that day, a day I spent at work telling military people from all over the country and the world what was happening, what we knew, what we didn't know, and trying to help them find out the whereabouts of loved ones.

I have told that story before, but not today.

Please read what I had to say seven years ago about this day and what it means.

There really is nothing more to say.

"Today is Patriots Day, where we honor those who perished, and those who were the first responders to the aftermath of the September 11, 2001, terrorists attacks.

So many of us seem to have forgotten that day--or at least put it out of our minds--and some of our young people--many of whom weren't even born when the tragedies occurred--look at it as ancient history.

But that horrid day weaves in and out of our current environment, our current problems, and yes, our current solutions, too.

And yes, my father had a story to tell about that day, a story that proved that there is a God in heaven, who was acting in his behalf when what happened happened.

As he told the story, he was at work that day, a day that started out like any other.

He woke up a 4 a.m. or thereabouts, got dressed, and did what he had to do to get ready for just another workday.

He was still young and strong that day--he would turn 70 on November 30 of that year, so he was doing exactly what he had been doing for all the years and years prior to this day.

Nothing out of the ordinary.

He took his cab, drove it into Manhattan, and started his workday, picking up passengers here and there for some relatively short jaunts around the city.

At sometime before or around 8:15 a.m., or so a fare took him to the World Trade Center, where he dropped off the passenger and immediately picked up another one, who wanted to go to a destination in Harlem.

That fare saved his life.

He drove that passenger to his destination, and at approximately 8:46 a.m. or so, he could see through the car windows that the World Trade Center was being hit by aircraft, and also through those windows, he could see that life would change forever in our country.

My father tried to get home, but it was a nearly impossible task that day.

Manhattan had pretty much gone on lockdown, and there was nowhere to go but to go into New Jersey and try to do an end around back to New York and to Long Island.

Cellphones were still in their infancy back then, and my father did not have one to call my mother about his whereabouts ... and even if he had one, as many who tried to do the same thing soon found out, cellphone service was extremely limited or non-existent throughout that day due to the rubble and carnage that ensued.

So throughout the day, my father simply tried to get back home, but we had no idea where he was, or even if he was safe.

He maneuvered the cab through New Jersey, and sometime around 8 p.m., he finally arrived home, so it took him approximately 11 hours or so for him to get back to Long Island and back home.

It must have been a harrowing day for him, as it was for all of us. But to be so far away from home, and finding his way back in increments, must have been incredible.

And that fare to Harlem ... that gentleman was my father's guardian angel for sure.

As we look back at that day, and I, personally, look back at my father's life, that was a signature day for both him and humanity.

We discovered that, if we didn't already know this yet, that human beings can be the most vicious and violent creatures on earth to justify whatever path they choose to take.

But human beings can also be accommodating, they can also be peaceful, and they can also go about their jobs with the utmost of respect and reserve and resolve to do the best job they can do.

We saw all of that on what we now call 9-11, or 9/11, whatever you prefer.

And on this day, we look back on the good, the bad and the ugly, and I do mean the very good, the very bad, and the very ugly.

We must never forget what happened that day, and work to never let it happen again.

I know that my father was only a minuscule piece of the puzzle that happened that day, but his drive and determination to find a way to get home was demonstrated by not only him, but millions of others on that dreadful day.

It once again proved that family comes first, whether it is your own personal brood or the family of humanity.

Family comes first, everything else comes in afterward.

So as we look back at the anniversary of that tragic day, let's remember that though all of our differences, through all of our highs and lows and in-betweens, we are all part of a single family, the family of humanity and human kind, and that we can get through everything if we do it together as one.

Have a great weekend, and I will speak to you again on Monday."

And Happy Rosh Hashanah--which begins at sunset this evening--to my Jewish family and friends.

Rant #4,015: Wonderful World

Don't get me started ... 

Don't get me started on Lindsay Clancy, Luigi Mangione, and the like.

They are all guilty as charged ...

But in this toxic environment we live in, the perpetrators are being painted as the victims, while those innocent people who they cast their scorn on are considered villains ...

Or at the very least, collateral damage.

Mangione has already pleaded guilty, and quite frankly, he deserves the death penalty for what he did to that health insurance executive.

He planned the whole thing out, shot the guy in the back, and yet ...

Mangione has so many adoring women at his beck and call that you would think that he was this generation's Paul, John, George and Ringo ...

Or at least Davy Jones and David Cassidy.

Clancy's case is just so insipid that it demonstrates what a sick world we live in.

She is as guilty as can be for killing her three kids in a fit of rage, which was underlined by her realizing this and trying to take her own life.

God saw to it that not only would she suffer for this attempt--she is paralyzed from it--but that she would be alive, and seemingly coherent, when standing trial for the severity of what she did.

But her defense claims some type of post-partum depression was the reason that she killed her kids, and thus, she was not fully culpable for her actions.

This is the worst type of baloney, even worse than Hebrew National cold cuts which have spoiled.

She can get the most severe charge--first degree murder--or the lesser charge--manslaughter--or be ruled not culpable for her actions due to reasons related to her depression.

Evidently, it has come out that one juror--one single male juror--did not go along with the other jurors' views that she was not culpable for her actions due to her mental condition, so there was a mistrial because the jury could not come to a full, in unison, verdict.

And then Clancy's lawyers asked President Trump for a pardon!

You cannot make this stuff up.

Let me tell you, Clancy is guilty of the most severe charge, and I am going to tell you why.

She had three children ... three kids ...

So you are telling me that this post-partum thing was a buildup from having three young children to care for?

I want to tell you something that I only found out about a few years back.

When my mother gave birth to me, she experienced what we now know is some level of post-partum depression.

She gave birth to me, and she really did not know how to take care of me.

She never harmed me, never did anything untoward to me.

Doctors didn't know that this type of malady exists, so I guess the doctors simply thought that she was a new mother, and that she would figure it out on her own.

My mother knew something wasn't right, and she did the right thing--

She called in my grandmother, her mother, who helped my mother through this thing, until my mother could stand on her own two feet and take care of me.

My mother did the right thing; Clancy obviously did not.

And all of the family members that attended this trial to support Clancy--

Where were they when she was going through all of this?

And again, this is not one kid, it was three kids.

Yes, Clancy is guilty of the top offense, and she should get the death penalty like Mangione, but neither will.

And again, Clancy has hordes of admirers, who look at her as a hero ...

And most of these, like with Mangione, are middle-aged women.

I always thought that women were the stronger and brighter of the two sexes, but I am beginning to have my doubts.

Many women born from the 1980s on are not the same women who were born earlier.

They are petulant, delusional, and I do think the reliance on the Internet has a lot to do with it.

And many of the men are no better.

So they can support Clancy, and Mangione all they like, but their blue hair and nose rings don't hide the fact that they are among the dumbest human beings on the face of the planet.

Making those that perpetrate these horrid crimes into heroes is just so abominable.

I don't know what these women get out of this, and a few commentators have postulated what these women need to get their feet planted on the ground again, so I won't get into that here.

And when we talk about Clancy and Mangione, and how cults have sprung up around them, don't get me started on another instance of perpetrators of horrid crimes being made into the victims--

Just look at what is happening in the Middle East, where Israel--and the U.S.--has become the villain and terrorists like Hamas/Palestinians and Hezbollah are looked upon as the victims, even though their crimes are horrid.

We live in such a strange world now, and level heads must prevail.

And that goes for the 25th anniversary of 9/11, which I will talk about in tomorrow's Rant.

Yes, the world has lost its collective mind.

Rant #4,014: Wrong

As I spoke about in yesterday's Rant, I called the cemetery office about my mother's plot not being taken care of, and the woman I spoke to said this to me:

"A mistake may have been made," relating to my mom's gravesite being totally devoid of care and full of weeds.

She said that the greenery which had been earmarked for my mother's grave might have been, instead, placed on someone else's nearby grave by mistake.

She said they would send a caretaker out to see the state of the site.

Again, this is not the world I was born into.

This is a world of complete ineptitude, one where this type of behavior seems to be accepted.

And when my sister called the cemetery, she received a com0letely different story.

Again, this is partly my family's fault, as we hadn't visited the grave to pay our respects in some time.

Again, I can make the excuse that we have been busy with so many other things, which we have, but that is not a good excuse.

We dropped the ball as much as the cemetery dropped the ball.

The only thing that is different is that the cemetery told us two different stories, neither which made much sense.

Now, we have been told that the site will be cleaned up, and bushes put where the weeds are.

So I have to say, I learned another life lesson, and I learned it the hard way:

You can't trust anyone or anything--not even a cemetery--to do the right thing.

In this bizarro world that we live in today, you have to be on top of everything, or nothing will get done.

Even to keep a gravesite in presentable fashion.

I don't even know how I feel right now.

Sure, I am upset with myself for not visiting the site and not making sure that our original wishes for greenery there were carried out.

But I am also upset with the cemetery, which should have done whatever they could to to make sure that my mother's gravesite was not a site of weeds.

So there is fault on both sides, making me kind of dizzy from the whole thing ...

Maybe even a bit numb about this episode.

Again, my father's site is fine, with nice greenery standing proudly right in front of his gravestone.

My mother's site ...

The gravestone stands out proudly, looks brand new--

But the actual grave site is nothing but a gaggle of weeds.

That is not what we intended it to look like, and whatever mistake that was made must be rectified ASAP.

The Jewish High Holy Days, beginning with Rosh Hashanah and ending with Yom Kippur, begin later this week, ironically on September 11, the evening of the 25th anniversary of one of the worst days in our nation's history.

I am not likening what happened that day to what happened to my mother's gravesite, but it all seems to be rolled into one, in sort of a strange way.

I believe that my mother deserves way better than this, and yes, I do blame myself for not going to the grave and seeing what was there, and not there, sooner.

My fault. My fault entirely.

I hope my mother, in heaven, forgives me for this obvious oversight--

And I hope that in the coming days, her gravesite will be something that looks presentable, is full of greenery, and something that she deserves for a long life well spent caring for her children and grandchildren.

She simply does not deserve this, and no matter whose fault it is--individually and/or collectively--my mother deserves much, much better.

Period.

Rant #4,013: Don't You Care

Labor Day was a "labor," what can I tell you.

Things are supposed to slow down that day, but for me, they revved up.

I decided to visit the cemetery where my parents are buried.

I, personally, had not been there in quite a while, but I decided to go on Labor Day because my father died on Labor Day, the same exact September 7 in 2020, when he passed, that Labor Day was on this year.

So I figured that I would visit both of their graves--they are not buried together, as this is an Orthodox Jewish cemetery, and men and women are buried separately--one, and then the other, just a few steps away from each other.

Admittedly, although I had a map of the place, it was still difficult for me to find the graves, but through trial and error, I finally found them, to my relief.

I found my father's grave first, and I have to tell you, it looked pretty spiffy.

It was taken care of with perpetual care, and everything was neat and tidy.

I said what I had to say, put a rock on top of the gravestone to signify that I had visited, and moved on to my mom's grave.

During her burial service, I am about 99.9 percent sure that we asked the cemetery for perpetual care for her site, but since we never received a bill from them for this service, I had a sneaking suspicion that our wishes were never applied--

And to my dismay, they weren't.

The site was full of weeds, and while the stone was immaculate--she passed away on Sept. 5, 2023, so it is only a few years back--the plot where it sits was awful.

I said what I had to say, put a stone on top of the gravestone to signify that I was there, and I left, to go to the cemetery office--

Which I found out was closed, at least when I was there, as again, it was Labor Day, a national holiday.

So I vowed to call them today--which I will do when the office opens at 9 a.m.--and get this thing figured out.

Look, when we buried my mother, the day was obviously an emotional one, and the unveiling of the stone some time later was also very emotional.

Perhaps things didn't get done that should have been done, but I am pretty sure that we did ask for perpetual care for my mom's site.

I believe my mother, when she still was cognizant before her mind went, might have paid for "forever" perpetual care for my father's grave, as we have never received a bill for that either, and his site looked very well kept.

But for my mother ...

I even remember talking to my brother in law about this, and we said we would alternate the payments, he paying one bill, me paying the next bill, and on and on into perpetuity.

But we never received a bill, so we were each at fault for not following up on this until now.

I could make every excuse in the world, but I won't--

We dropped the ball on this, and the results were disturbing.

There is no moral to this story ...

Just that when a loved one like a parent passes, the survivors have to keep up on things like this, and quite frankly, we simply didn't.

But at least now, we will start to take care of it, giving my mother the proper burial site that she deserves.

As the song goes, "Sorry seems to be the hardest word," but all I can say to my mom and dad after visiting them yesterday is--

"SORRY."

Rant #4,012: Reflections

Labor Day is coming up on Monday, and as I explained yesterday, I have a lot of mixed feelings about the holiday--

Nothing to do with the holiday itself, but with the fact that my father died on the holiday a few years back--yes, on September 7, 2020--and my mother passed away a few years later around the same time. 

Much less in my mind in 2026 is that for many years when I was working full-time, I worked on Labor Day, and honestly, it was just so unnecessary.

Those feelings have dissipated over time, as I am almost at the seven-year mark for when I lost my job on October 10 when the company I worked for went out of business right before the pandemic.

Things have been very difficult for myself and my family since then, and it isn't getting better anytime soon, but that really has nothing to do with Labor Day.

Compound all of this with the Jewish High Holy Days, which are right around the bend.

Ironically, Rosh Hashanah begins at sundown on September 11, and this year, that day takes on added significance, as it is the 25th anniversary of the 9-11 terrorist attacks.

So, at least for me, this is a pretty somber period, and again, it has absolutely nothing to do with Labor Day per se.

Labor Day honors the American labor movement and is a federal holiday in the United States.

It is really a joyous occasion, and since it is a federal holiday, most people, ironically, have the day off from their normal work labors.

People go to ballgames, have fireworks, there are barbecues and family get togethers.

And Labor Day is also the unofficial end of summer, although it actually ends about two weeks later.

For me, I will hand in some work that day, although the federal government--and the association I work for--will be closed to honor the holiday.

I will probably write up and edit some work for them, so I have it handy when everything gets back to normal the next day.

There won't be any family gatherings or anything like that, at least with my family.

Both my son and wife have to work that day, so if I have a barbecue, it will be mainly for myself, although I could heat up some things for them as they arrive home from work.

But otherwise, it will be just another day for me, really nothing more or less than that.

However, I am going to take the day off from writing here at the Blog, so it feels like the holiday it really is.

But more importantly, it will give me time to think about my parents, and think about my future good health.

I will rev it up again on Tuesday.

So enjoy yourself on the holiday, have a great weekend, and I will speak to you again on Tuesday.