Rant #3,551: Every Day I Write the Book

I had a test done at my doctor first thing in the morning yesterday, and it came out quite well, so my day started off pretty nicely.

Later on in the day, my family and I--this includes my sister's family--finally closed out the bank account that helped sustain my mother in her final years.

Without going into too much detail, it was the account where we took care of any and all of the bills she accrued during the last years of her life.

There wasn't much left in the account, so we finally closed it down for good.

As I drove to the bank to help get this done, I felt kind of sad about the finality of all of this, but it is something we really had to do, and it was the time to do it.

During my mother's final years, we took care of all of her debts with this account, as well as anything she needed during that time.

Happily, that account was able to provide everything she needed, and she never had to worry about her finances during those last years.

With her dementia, she really couldn't handle her finances, so that account was her financial lifeline as she entered her 90s.

So yes, I was a bit sad while I did what I did in the bank, but there was no sense in keeping the account going.

Another chapter closed ... and it is probably the final chapter.

Otherwise, yesterday was a pretty quiet day, and maybe that is how it should have been.

I miss my mom, and my dad, but life goes on.

Yesterday ended up being a day to reflect on my parents, right in between the holiest days on the Jewish calendar, Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.

And on the one-year anniversary of the Hamas massacre in Israel.

And as I do every year, later this week, I will be fasting on Yom Kippur. I am the only one in my family who does it, and when I do it, I feel as if I am not just doing it for myself, but I am also doing it for my family.

My parents led the way for me, and they participated in the fast as long as they could.

I am simply picking up the baton from them, and running with it, so the fast not only shows my reverance for God, but also for my parents, and the legacy they left behind on our family.

Everyone has a book of many chapters, and an account, that needs to be rendered each day, month and year.

My father used to say that during Yom Kippur, God is writing in his book the names of those who will make the "cut" to live on for another year, and also those who wouldn't survive, so we fasted because the act demonstrated to God that we were serious about erasing our sins, and we wanted to go on for the new year.

So God had his own rendering to make, to either keep you going or to close the book on you.

And the closing of the account that helped my mom, I could look at it as the "final chapter," as I mentioned earlier, but I guess I can also look at it as the "next chapter," for our family ... and I can look at this year's Yom Kippur in the same exact way.

Yes, I like "next chapter" a bit better.