Rant #2,528: Plastic People

Today, I am going to tie a couple of things together with a nice bow.

I hope that it works for both you and me.

On March 1, New York State will be implementing its long-awaited ban on plastic bags. The measure, which includes each and every county in the state, places restrictions the sale of plastic bags, mainly in supermarkets.

For instance, if you still want a plastic bag for your groceries, you will have to pay five cents for each bag you use.

Paper bags are under some restriction, too, as supermarkets can charge the same five cents for these bags, which cost more to produce than plastic bags do. There is no statewide restriction on paper bags, so some supermarkets will charge five cents per bag, others won't.

These restrictions on plastic bags have already been around in certain counties of New York State for years, including in Suffolk County. My family and I live in Nassau County, but we less than a mile away from Suffolk, so when we have done our shopping in Suffolk, we know we have to bring our own bags for packing.

The law does not impact every bit of plastic that is still going to be used, including in certain packaging, so plastic will not fully go the way of the dinosaur.

And, of course, the reasons for this are environmental. While they are well meaning, I just think that consumers are going to get stuck again with the bill, and prices on consumer items, in the supermarket in particular, will rise as a result of people not electing to use the plastic bags and/or the paper bags.

Further, yes, the environment will be saved by the scarcity of plastic bags, which do not break down safely ecologically, but look at all the other plastic that we use that will still be legal--including water and soda bottles, which also litter the environment--and you see that that type of non-biogradeable junk will still be around, so unless you ban plastic 100 percent, you might think you are getting ahead of the situation, but your really aren't.

And what about retailers who can still use plastic bags, like restaurants and fast food places? Those bags will still litter our environment, so what exactly are you going by lessening their impact in just certain places, like supermarkets?

A better response to the plastic bag mess might be to recycle them, like we do water and soda bottles, getting back money when we turn them in.

If industry can create bottle retention machines, industry can create plastic bag retention machines.

I always turn in my bottles--not just plastic but cans and glass bottles too--and you can garner a nice return if you collect enough bottles. I do it every two weeks or so, and I make back between $5 and $6 each time, which I invariably use to pay for some extra items from the supermarket.

Can't we also do this with plastic bags?

Now, here is my segueway ...

I remember as a kid that we used to use a shaker bottle, made out of plastic, of course, to create a treat for ourselves.

Sure, in today's world, the product called "Great Shakes" would be looked down upon as unhealthy and something that we don't really need to imbibe as kids, but I just remember that it was just sooooo good, I can almost taste it today.

No, it is not still repeating on me, but it was a fun way to have a quick shake on a hot day.

If I remember correctly, the concoction came in a box--paper, not plastic--but it contained a shaker cup that was all plastic. The box came with some type of pre-made concoction in a tube. You poured the tube's contents into the shaker cup, added milk--whole milk, the only people who drank skim milk were our grandparents--and you shook the thing up for a minute or two. You took the cover off the shaker cup, and you had a perfect, although kind of thin, chocolate malted.

I don't remember if it came in vanilla or strawberry, but the chocolate one was just so good.

And this product was quite popular with us younger folk. In fact, to entice our moms to buy the product for us, there were a couple of records released featuring the hottest rock acts of the time if you bought the product and sent away box tops (I think). Here is one of them; I have the two that came out, but one without the picture sleeve.

And here is the audio commercial from the Yardbirds about "Great Shakes." And you wonder why Led Zeppelin came about a few years later! https://youtu.be/Czb7EZWxc14

And this wasn't the only such product that you shook in a plastic container to get a sugar-filled concoction from.

There was also "Shake-A-Pudd'n'" (puddin', puddin', Shake-A-Pudd'n'") which I don't have as clear a recollection of, but I think it was very similar to "Great Shakes." So, you had a shaker cup included in the product's box to make the concoction.

This time, you added water to the shaker or the box, shook the whole thing for a minute or two, and you came out with some type of thin pudding that wasn't as good as the regular pudding your mother made, but in a pinch, it was OK.

And the marketing of the product was similar to that of "Great Shakes," with heavy commercial rotation on TV and tie-ins with popular movies and TV shows of the time.

Here are a few commercials to help you remember this product, or discover it for the first time: https://youtu.be/hbA1zkXiEmM

I know that I really liked both, but neither really lasted very long on the shelves and faded from view entirely before the 1960s did.

So as we talk about plastic, paper and everything else we use to hold and box products that we love ... well, I am still trying to find a proper tie-in, but I am coming up little short ...

Other than to say that supermarket plastic bags are seemingly going the way of "Great Shakes" and "Shake-A-Pudd'n'," and will only be a distant memory for many of us in the future.

OK, I got it! How'd I do?