Rant #1,750: Body Graffiti

To all my readers--and I know you are there, because I have the metrics that you can't see to show me that people are reading this five-days-a-week column from all over the world--this column is not a knock against anyone personally, it is wholly my opinion.

Actually, all my columns are just that, but some people do take very personal offense to some of the things I say, and to them, I say that here is another column that you will needlessly take personal offense to.

Here goes ...

I don't like tattoos.

I don't like them on men, and I certainly don't like them on women.

To me, it is nothing more than body graffiti, a way to mark up the bodies that God gave us and make them less than perfect.

Tattoos are often garish, disgusting, and really do take away from a person's self.

And the body graffiti today is truly disgusting, almost being in your face.

Yes, I know that societal mores have changed, and tattoos--in particular, on women--are more accepted than ever, but let me tell you, I find them completely unattractive.

Tattoos used to be gotten during drunken forays while a man was in the service.

Today, people knowingly mark up their bodies with huge tattoos, taking away from the splendor of what they have.

I know, every tattoo tells a story.

Many people get tattoos, collect them like I collect vinyl records, and if you ask them, they will point to this one and that one and let you know what it is all about.

Their tattoos honor mom, dad, their wives, their husbands, things they like to do, and things they believe in.

I get that; it's like carrying a personal diary wherever you go.

But to mark yourself up like that ... not a thing I would do.

I always thought that some people hide behind their tattoos because not only is it expression, it is the only way they can express themselves.

This probably isn't true, though I guess one tattoo is worth a thousand words.

Jews are not supposed to get tattoos because of a variety of reasons, one of which is that we are supposed to leave this earth the way we came here, completely unmarked.

It also brings up the Holocaust, where many Jews were tattooed by the Nazis with numbers.

But even that is changing, and several generations removed from that horror, many young Jews are getting tattoos. My daughter has a few, as does my nephew.

Still, I don't get it, in particular on women.

God created women perfectly, and to add tattoos to the mix just makes a woman's body imperfect.

It is a complete and total turnoff to me.

I just remember days of yore, when as kids, we used to get cockamamies, or tattoos you applied with a little spit.

They went on your arm, but would come right off with a washcloth and some water.

Today, these huge, often garish tattoos cannot come off so easily, and an industry is developing for those who want to get rid of their tattoos.

It is a process, and science will one day come up with easier ways to remove these things, and there will be a big market for them in the coming years, as people look at the tattoos they got in their 20s and decide that they don't look so good when they are in their 50s.

There is really nothing much more to say about tattoos. Nothing really spurned me to do such a column, and I might have already written about my dislike for tattoos in a previous column, but here it is again.

What I wrote is my belief, my opinion, and no one has to agree with me on any of this.

Tattooed people are not bad people, they are very trendy, very with it, very now.

Me, I liked it better where the only tattooed people you saw were in the circus.

Today, the world is a circus, so I guess we are all under the big top.

Tattoo you, but don't tattoo me.