Rant #1,529: Eating While You Work

Yes, Chase Utley deserved his suspension for sliding into second base like a kamikaze pilot during the National League playoffs.

Just watch the tape; there really is no further analysis needed.

And thus, I have nothing more to say on the subject, other than you know this will be appealed, and he will be in the lineup tonight, ready, willing and able to get plunked if the Mets pitchers feel that is necessary.

Let's move on.

I usually get up around 4 a.m. in the morning, so by 4:30 a.m., I am ready to have my breakfast.

I have cereal, sometimes Cheerios--in all of its different varieties--but lately, I have a Captain Crunch thing, and since I can get a small box at the local dollar store for $1, I have been leaning toward the good captain to fill me up in the morning.

But let me tell you, by 10 a.m. or so, I get kind of hungry.

I am in the middle of my work day, and the hunger pangs often begin at this time, since it is more than five hours since I have last eaten.

Not every day, but maybe two or three times a week, I succumb to those pains, and I have a little something to munch on as I go about my morning work day.

What do I have in the morning? It is something that leads me back to my childhood.

In the dollar store, for just a dollar, is a six-pack of Toast Chee from Lance, a simple concoction that I have enjoyed since I was a kid.

It is simply a cheese-flavored cracker, or actually two of those, with peanut butter cream--not real peanut butter, but it will suffice--in the middle.

It is crunchy, has a minimum of taste, and probably is full of calories, but it does it for me.

Four packages of these small sandwiches, with four sandwiches in them--each of which maybe measures an inch by an inch--are in the dollar store variety, but you can also get them at six in a package in the regular supermarket.

These things kind of satisfy my early day hunger, or at least satiate me until I eat lunch at 12:30 p.m.

This is just one variation of this snack. I believe you can get peanut butter and jelly, and there is actually a spicier variation too.

I first had these as a kid, and I am sure this snack has probably been around longer than I have been on this earth.

It is simple, and in its simplicity, it does the job.

I have tried other things, like Pop Tarts, to satiate my hunger, but it is just too heavy, and it is almost like I am having two breakfasts if I have Pop Tarts five hours after I have eaten my real breakfast.

So this is perfect--not too filling, not another breakfast, but it kind of satisfies my hunger to a certain extent.

Whoever thought of this snack gets an A for effort and about a B for flavor.

Look, it's not like having Skippy peanut butter between two Saltine or Ritz crackers, but it will do, and it does it for me.

And it has nothing to do with the Chase Utley slide, and that makes it even better.

Maybe he will discover this snack as he sits out some time--whether during the playoffs or at some time next season--and it will make him a better ballplayer.

And you just know that the Dodgers will be taking some cheese tonight from the Mets.

And it won't be Toast Chee, either.