Classic Rant #532 (June 23, 2011): Ban Stays

As a short followup to yesterday's story, the East Rockaway, New York, students who were banned from their prom and graduation ceremonies due to their participation in a water balloon fight are still banned.

School district officials heard what the participants, and their parents, had to say about the ban, but they ultimately decided that since warnings were sent out in writing about the consequences of engaging in this activity, they kept the ban in place.

Each of the participants' situations were looked at on an individual basis, and the ban was kept intact. It is not known how many of the 50 students who participated in this fight are part of the ban.

As I wrote yesterday, one of my sources said that some of the balloons were not only filled with water, but might have been filled with urine and Nair. Nair uses various chemical compounds to aid hair removal, including calcium hydroxide, also known as lime. This can be an irritant if it gets in someone's eyes or mouth.

This is completely unsubstantiated, but if it is true, it adds to the mess.

Kids had to dodge the balloons on a traffic-filled street, and administrators and a crossing guard were also pelted.

Bravo to the school administration on this one. They did their due diligence--they reviewed each case individually--and they stood their ground.

It is not as if the kids didn't know not to participate in this action. Notices were sent out on two occasions, and parents and kids should have realized that the ramifications to this action were great.

I love how the parents are protecting their wonderful children on this one. Obviously, they didn't do a real good job, because they lost their case.

Now, the parents have a chance to explain to their kids that because of their stupid actions, they robbed them of the feeling of accomplishment that goes with going to a graduation and seeing your child receive their diploma.

I had that feeling last year when my daughter graduated college. It is a good feeling, one that these parents, because of their own stupidity and the stupidity of their children, might never experience.

The prom is one thing--not everyone goes to the prom--but to miss out on graduation, well that is a shame.

I also heard from my source that this is a school district that will back its students to the highest degree, but when the district gets backed into a corner, like they did in this incident, they understandably have zero tolerance.

No, these kids aren't angels by any stretch of the imagination, and yes, they deserve their punishment.

The saddest part of this is that the school is teaching these kids what is right and what is wrong, instead of their parents.

Yes, that is the saddest thing about this incident, not that the kids lost their graduation, but that the schools have become the parents, because the parents have failed.

How sad.

Rant #1,877: Tragedy

I am sure that you heard about the recent tragedy that happened at Sacred Heart University in Connecticut, where 20 year old student Caitlin Nelson died three days after participating in a pancake eating contest at the school.

Nelson, the daughter of an officer who died during 9-11, choked on piece of pancake and could not be revived.

It is a sad story, a really said one considering her circumstances.

Her father's tragic death due to terrorism was covered extensively on New York City television back in the day, and she appeared during that coverage as a child coping with such a tragedy.

Due to this latest unfortunate news, the local outlets here all went into their archives and found those videos, and showed them again related to Caitlin Nelson's own death.

She seemed to be a pretty, happy, adjusted kid who went on with her life after losing her dad.

Whatever the case, food eating contests are part of our culture, and really, things like this don't generally happen during these contests, but there is always the possibility of a tragedy like this during these competitions.

We herald the hot dog eaters on July 4, but there is a certain amount of risk involved in stuffing large amounts of food down your throat.

Way back in 1975, I actually participated in such an event. It is one of the few memories I have of high school that I don't cringe about.

It was during our class' Senior Variety Show, where we tried to raise money for our class, and I participated as someone trying to break the world donut eating record.

I got all the documentation from the Guinness Book of Records in England, and went about doing this in front of a couple of hundred people in my high school auditorium.

People were cheering me on during this thing, as I stuffed one donut after another down my throat over a 10-minute stretch.

The last thing on my mind was choking.

I had prepared for this event by doing some "eating gymnastics" at home to get my mouth and throat used to stretching, and it did work--I ate 23 donuts in 10 minutes and probably held the record for a few minutes.

I later found out through the Guinness people that someone in Europe somewhere, around that same time, actually ate something like 30 in five minutes, or thereabouts, so my record was never officially recognized and if I actually had the record, it did not last too long.

Whatever the case, I prepared for such an event; I doubt that most people who don't do this professionally actually do.

But even if they do, there is always the possibility that food will get stuck in your throat and that serious circumstances can happen, like what happened to this young student.

It can happen in everyday life, too.

When my daughter was little, we were at McDonald's, and a piece of hamburger got stuck in her windpipe. Thank God I had the presence of mind to jump up and perform the Heimlich Maneuver on her. I got the hamburger out of her throat, and yes, she does remember the incident to this day.

These things happen, and they happen when we least expect it.

The latest incident, where happiness turned to tragedy so quickly, just shows that these types of events should be monitored closely, with at least one doctor in attendance just in case.

I got away with what I was doing, but all it takes is one incident like this to wake us all up, and alert us to the possible danger of doing such things.

May Caitlin Nelson rest in peace. At least now, she is with her dad, but it shouldn't have been this way.

Classic Rant #531 (June 22, 2011): Water Balloons Bursting In Air

You might have heard about this story. It has made national news.

A group of East Rockaway, Long Island, High School students are being banned from their prom and graduation ceremony because they participated in a water balloon fight just off of school grounds.

About 50 students participated in the fight, which is supposedly an annual "rite of passage" at the school. Never before has the school taken action against fight participants.

However, this time, the fight kind of got out of hand. Not only were participants pelted with water balloons, but reportedly so were two high school administrators, a crossing guard, and several students who were not participating in the fight.

The school claims that the participants were causing traffic and safety problems, and were told to stop or they would face disciplinary action.

The decided to go on with the fight.

The parents of the participants have appealed to the school, and administrators are deciding whether they should go on with the ban or not.

The prom and graduation are big events for high school seniors. These kids worked hard to get to this point, and after a dozen years in the system (plus kindergarten), they are being banned from these big events in their lives due to one blemish.

But on the other hand, the fight evidently did get out of hand, and people not even participating were getting pelted on a busy street. When the crossing guard gets hit, you know the thing got out of hand. And the kids were told to stop, or else.

Let me tell you a story. I was substitute teaching in a middle-class district on Long Island. I was standing in for a well-regarded veteran teacher, and I had to sub for his five classes one late May day.

I didn't have many problems until I got to one class, filled with graduating seniors. The teacher gave me one thing to do with the kids. It would have taken 15 minutes to complete.

The problem was that that day, the seniors got their yearbooks. I recognized that, and I said that if they just did this one thing that the teacher left for them, they would have the rest of the 45-minute period to have their yearbooks signed. Heck, I told them that I would even sign the yearbook if they wanted me to.

Well, after about five minutes of pleading, the kids finally got what I was saying and decided that they would do what I was asking.

Except for one kid.

He verbally abused me, using every curse his 18 year old mind knew, he threatened me, and he was a nuisance.

After a warning and continued taunts, I yanked away his yearbook from him, and placed it in a drawer in the teacher's desk, As many of you know, once you close the top drawer of a teacher's desk, the other drawers automatically lock. So I had the yearbook in the drawer, locked away, and I said that I would give it back to him after the lesson.

And I fully intended to do this.

The kid went ballistic, to a degree I have never seen. His adrenalin must have kicked in on high, because he rushed at me, still yelling and screaming, and threatened me with bodily harm. About five boys tried to grab him, and he knocked all of them down with one fell swoop. And these boys who tried to restrain him were not small.

He then went to his seat, which was in the front row. If you recall, in high school, the chair is attached to the desk.

He proceeded to pick it up, and throw it at me.

Yes, throw it at me, a chair and desk that probably weighed 50 lbs. or more.

It went over my head, hit the blackboard, and bounced harmlessly away.

As I was in shock, he ran out of the classroom.

He brought back a teacher who was on hall duty, and the teacher was defending him, believe it or not. I threw both the kid and the teacher out of the room, and somehow proceeded with the lesson.

And yes, as promised the kids got their time with their yearbooks.

(By the way, the class I was teaching was Religion. I kid you not.)

I reported the kid, and the school said they would take care of him.

And take care of him they did.

I mean, I could have been hurt or worse, and since they don't care about subs, what would have happened if the projectile hit one of the other kids? I don't even want to think about it.

And when I say take care of him, they did.

I asked that he be suspended from graduation and the prom.

They suspended him for one day. In late June. And that was it.

So when I heard about the incident at East Rockaway High School, I originally thought that maybe the punishment was too harsh.

But then I remembered my experience, and I quickly changed my mind.

The punishment not only isn't too harsh, it is too lenient.

These kids should not only be banned from the prom and graduation, they probably should have to do some community service work too. And they should have had to clean up the grounds that they soiled with their water balloons.

What would have happened if they injured someone while doing this? What would have happened if someone got in a car accident because of this?

The school probably would have been sued, that's what.

As the parent of a 15 year old and a 23 year old, I think we have to be a bit strict with these kids, because the consequences of their actions could have been much worse.

Schools have to send out a message to kids--and their parents--that this type of behavior will not be tolerated, because it only takes one time for something really, really bad to happen.

(And no, I don't want these kids punished in retaliation for the kid in my incident getting a slap on the wrist, if that is what you are thinking.)

Throw the book at them. Let them learn that there is a right way to handle yourself and a wrong way to handle yourself.

And they handled themselves in a very wrong way during this incident.

Rant #1,876: Shop Around

On April 22, I know where I will be, at least in the morning.

And thousands of people around the country will join me in doing the same thing.

We will be at our local record stores, where the 10th annual Record Store Day will be held.

What is Record Store Day?

It is a day to not only celebrate the music that we love, but the local stores that bring us this music.

No, I am not talking about the big box electronics and department stores that just happen to have CDs in their assortment.

I am talking about the local mom and pop record stores, a dying breed just a few years back but with the resurgence of vinyl records, have once again become vital, not just for record collectors like myself, but for main streets across the country.

Big box stores are fine in what they do, but for records, you absolutely must shop your local record stores, for their personal attention, for their knowledge, and yes, for the fun of finding that one record you have been looking for forever and that you can only find at your local record store.

And there will be numerous Record Store Day releases to whet your appetite, many bringing you music you didn't know existed.

The newer stuff will bring you current artists and classic artists, and people will be lined up to get their favorites, stuff specifically put out for the day.

Me, I will be interested in that, but I will still gravitate towards 45s and LPs from the past, because that is my main musical interest.

To me, there is nothing like shopping in your local record store, and finding something that you classify as extraordinary.

Others might not characterize this particular item the same way, but that is the beauty of it all: what is your treasure is someone else's trash, and vice versa.

And vinyl ... I am glad today's kids have picked up on this format. There is nothing like listening to music on vinyl. It just comes across as purer than on a CD or an MP3.

So whatever your personal tastes, give your local record store a spin. Not only will you be participating in a nice event, but you will be helping to boost main streets across the country.

Remember, April 22--circle the date on your calendar. You won't be sorry that you did.

Classic Rant #530 (June 21, 2011): The Hefner Hop

Yes, Hugh Hefner has found a new lady love to serve as his latest girlfriend.

Evidently, news reports are that the Playboy founder has named Anna Sophia Berglund, 25 years old, as his latest flame.

According to these reports, she helped console him during the past week, when former fiancee Crystal Harris flew the coop.

Yes, this continues to be pretty wretched, to say the least.

Hefner is old enough to be her great grandfather, and what would a 25 year old see in someone in their mid 80s?

Cash. Fame. Fortune. Exposure (beyond her January 2011 pictorial).

We all know this is a sham. I would not be surprised if the Hefner/Harris nuptials were too.

Hefner promises them all of those things, and they take the bait. They just have to be by his side for x amount of time, and then they can do what they want with what he has given them.

He is the consummate "dirty old man" with his nice sailor hat. You can just see him posing with these young blondes with his hand pinching their rump.

But these girls take it. If he leads them to fame and fortune--and the ability to pay for their plastic surgeries--why not?

You can laugh at this, but if this was your daughter, partying around with an 85 year old, I don't think you would be laughing that hard anymore.

Hefner is skanky, but he is oh so rich. Money always talks, and when it talks, these girls listen, and they take the bait.

But just think about it--an man 60 years the senior of his new love interest, holding hands and doing who knows what together.

Yuck!

(And yes, I know about Green Mile actor Doug Hutchison and his new wife, Courtney Alexis Stodden--he is 51, she is 16--more yuck! And her parents gave their permission to his union yet!)

Rant #1,875: Gone, Gone, Gone

We are in April, and the month has started off with a lot of hope, and a lot of anguish.

My family started the month off by attending a 60th anniversary party, which was OK. My wife and I have a lot of time to go before we reach our own 60th, but there is a lot of hope there.

Of course, the basketball season continued, and the Knicks continue to be awful, playing out the string in such an obvious fashion.

Baseball began yesterday, and although my team, the New York Yankees, played a forgettable opener against the Tampa Bay Rays, hope does spring eternal that the season will go well for the team in the Bronx.

And to top it off, yesterday was WrestleMania, the ultimate pro wrestling event for those who are into this thing, and one of the most widely viewed events on the Internet. What I saw of it was pretty good, although I admit that I fell asleep and didn't see too much (my son will fill me in on what I missed).

But last night, a co-worker of mine passed on some very disturbing news about a fellow former co-worker of ours, and it was disturbing to me on a number of levels.

E.B., a former salesman at the place that I worked, died in a major car accident on Friday morning, March 31, in the town I live in--and just a few blocks away from where I had my own major car accident nearly three years ago.

From the reports that I read, he was in his Jeep, and was looking to make a left on Hicksville Road, a major north/south thoroughfare in my town. It was raining, and raining pretty heavily, and either he misjudged how much room/time he had to make the left turn, or the oncoming Dodge Ram truck was too close to him going south, or whatever, but the two collided, and E.B. suffered the most from the collision. He was pronounced dead at a local hospital at about 1 p.m.

The other driver suffered some injuries, but none life threatening.

The police impounded the two vehicles, but it is not being looked at as anything other than a horrible car accident.

First off, while I had minimum contact with E.B. at work, I did know him, he was a good salesman, and my contact with him showed him to be a pretty nice guy.

Second, with the accident happening just a few blocks from where my own accident happen, it is a "there but for the grace of God" moment, because without going into graphic detail, that could have been myself and my family on May 10, 2014.

We were darn lucky, we knew it at the time, and nearly three years later, we still know it and thank God that we only lost my car in the collision that we had.

And yes, rightly or wrongly, I do think this is an omen for the eventual demise of the company I work for, and my hunt for another position continues unabated.

There is a black cloud hanging over this company, and again, rightly or wrongly, I just feel that this latest horrific incident signals that the iceberg is now truly within few view.

To me, it really is a confluence of events, all of which are telling me that the time to get out of this place is right now, no matter what the work circumstances are.

And for the accident to have happened right near where mine did ... this has literally hit me too close to home.

I send my regards out to his family, and I am sure that his life--and death--will be a topic of discussion today at work.

Life really is way too short, it really is.

Classic Rant #529 (June 20, 2017): Hey, Hey, They Will Always Be the Monkees

My family and I took a step back in time when we saw the Monkees perform at Westbury this past Friday, June 17, and it was surely a wonderful nostalgic ride back to the 1960s.

Let's face it. The Beatles can never get back together, so for most of us, this is the next best thing.

But for me, the Monkees were it, are it, and continue to be it.

I loved the Beatles. Right after seeing them on "The Ed Sullivan Show" back in February 1964, I, like everyone else watching that show, fell in love with them.

And I continue to love the Beatles.

But, the Monkees were created for ME.

In 1966, when their show went on the air a few weeks after "Last Train to Clarksville" debuted, I knew that this was MY rock band. Being nine years old at the time, the show was created for my generation.

Micky Dolenz, Michael Nesmith, Peter Tork and Davy Jones were the next best thing to the Beatles. Their songs, like the Beatles' music, was airy and catchy, and perfect for pop Top 40 radio.

They had lots of hits, had four No. 1 LPs, and faded off the face of the earth as quickly as they came.

But unlike other successful acts of the time, they still had that wonderful TV show.

Showing it to numerous generations of kids, each generation has basically adopted the band, to a certain extent. And if your kids know Lady Gaga, I will bet you that they know "I'm a Believer" too. (The show currently runs on the weekends on Antenna TV, and it is out on DVD.)

Peter, Micky and Davy were in fine form on Friday night. They've sung these songs their whole lives, but on this tour, they seem to be reinvigorated. Perhaps they know that this might be it for them as an actual touring act, as they are getting a bit long in the tooth.

But you wouldn't know it during this performance. These guys were bouncing around like musicians a third of their age, and they seemed to be having lots of fun doing it.

They did about 40 songs in slightly more than two hours. Our show did not have an intermission, so they did it straight through.

Augmented by videos overhead of the show, commercials that they had done, and photo pastiches that evoked the 1960s and 1970s, the exuberantly did everything from "Clarksville" to "That Was Then, This Is Now," their MTV-inspired hit from 1986.

They have a terrific backing band, but the boys do play their own instruments, and they each played several instruments. And yes, Micky did play drums, which I was happy to see. He usually plays guitar on tour, but he did play drums, and played them well.

Davy is a little heavier, but he is really the consummate entertainer. He brings a British music hall mentality to the proceedings, and it carries over well, And when you see him as a sort of whirling dervish when he does the "Head" film's "Daddy's Song," you really can't believe that this guy is probably getting Social Security.

Micky is in fine voice, and is quite a fine musician. I have met him, and interviewed him, and he is about the nicest person you'd ever want to meet. He is firmly grounded, and that probably helps.

Peter, who overcame a rare form of throat and tongue cancer, was a revelation. The guy plays about six or seven instruments during the show, and even though his speech is a little impaired, his singing voice is probably the best that it has ever been. He looks a little weather beaten, but this guy is going to be 70 in February of next year--it is hard to believe.

We were in the fifth row from the stage, and had great views of everything. The sold out house was really into the show, and they were singing along during much of the show. And the audience--I saw little kids who also were singing along, I saw lots of teenagers, I saw people my age, and I saw people my parents' age.

The three Monkees--and no Mike Nesmith, as he has once again decided not to tour with the others--were terrific, and the show itself, in different forms, has been getting terrific reviews both Stateside and in Europe.

If the Monkees come to your area, go seem them. You will not be disappointed.

They are an absolutely unique act, probably the most popular act after the Beatles and the Rolling Stones from that era (yes, I know about acts like the Who, but they really became big in America late in the 1960s--in 1966, they were still a curiosity here). And their members are all still on this planet. The only other band from the era that I think can boast about that is the Hollies.

The Monkees will forever be from 1966, those four cute guys who actually were quite talented, way beyond the "boy band" monicker they have been given by today's ignorant media. They were, actually, our Beatles, whether anyone (including the Monkees themselves) wanted to acknowledge it or not, and the advances in music that surrounded their creation set the groundwork for the future of rock and roll.

Whether they will ever be acknowledged by the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is anyone's guess, but I have to tell you, they are in my personal Hall of Fame.

Thanks Micky, Peter, and Davy (and Michael too). You guys are really something special.