Well, at least it got people stirred up, which means their brains were working, maybe not in the right way in my estimation, but at least it created some type of dialogue ...
Yes, the backlash to yesterday's Rant on Facebook was quick and to the point.
You either agreed with me or ... well, you begged the question, meaning that you leap frogged over what I said and basically told me to stop being so "intense" about how Hanukkah and Jews themselves are portrayed--or really, not portrayed--on network television in the year 2015.
Whether you acknowledge it or not, "The Goldbergs," a benign TV show that is popular among a lot of people, even though to me it is merely a 1980s rehash of a far superior program, "The Wonder Years," has its first end of the year holiday show on Wednesday evening, and finally acknowledged that the family was, in fact, a Jewish one--in its third season.
There were numerous positive themes that the show explored, including that of tradition, and I thought it handled that just fine.
However, it pretty much trashed Hanukkah as nothing more than a tortuous, eight-day marathon, and I took issue with that.
"The Festival of Lights" is a joyous holiday, one filled with color and happiness, all centered around the menorah, the candelabra symbolizing the miracle with the oil that happened eons ago.
But the show kind of downplayed that, never resolving its early-show display that Hanukkah is nothing more than a drawn out occasion to get new underwear from your parents.
Well, I put the applause and the criticisms on Facebook, and on "The Goldbergs" official site, and no less than the real Beverly Goldberg, the real matriarch of the real Goldberg family, took me to task--over the objections of her son, the real Adam Goldberg, who told her not to argue with me (there was no argument; as usual, when you disagree on Facebook, people automatically take it as an argument; it was merely a discussion featuring two different viewpoints)--and reiterated that Hanukkah was a boring, bland, colorless holiday.
Again, one of the Jews' problems is that we so much want to fit in, we so much like to be what we are not, that we lose sight of who we are, which, actually, was a central theme of the show the other night.
Mrs. Goldberg, you have a right to your opinion, and I have a right to mine, and I beg to differ with you about Hanukkah.
But being that as it is, at least I got a dialogue started. This is a VERY touchy subject in the Jewish community, and some Jews would rather bury it and not talk about it at all.
I do believe that the need, the desire, the absolutely craving that we need to be something that we're not is what is really killing our community, and the way the current Jewish experience is portrayed in popular media is helping the death come quicker.
And what is worse, the acceptance of this situation by my Jewish brothers and sisters is repulsive, and in an unfortunate way, gives credence to the anti-Semites of the world to justify what they do.
Yes, I am being heavy handed, but I see it all around me.
Heck, I am as guilty of it, in a certain way, as anyone else.
I haven't been to synagogue in some years, and I don't belong to one, either.
I follow the major holidays, and my kids do know that they are Jews.
But, I am unaffiliated by choice. We had a terrible experience around the time my son got bar mitzvahed seven years ago with our synagogue--a newly formed one, absorbing our synagogue into a larger and more financially solvent one--and after that experience, my wife and I decided we would step away from it all--and we did.
But I at least know I am Jewish. I don't go around making believe I am something that I am not.
I am not telling anybody how to be Jews, but Jewishness isn't simply just going to or belonging to a temple; it is what you feel inside, what you are on the outside, and you put that all together, and yes, I am Jewish, although people will take me to task for what I just said.
"The Goldbergs" took a small step for American Jews the other night, a very important small step, to show that we don't have horns, we are your friends, co-workers and neighbors. We are no different from anyone else, even though yes, we are a little bit different in the ways we do things and the holidays we celebrate.
So during this holiday season, I say "Happy Holidays" to everyone, and I will speak to you again on Monday as I later light the sixth candle on our electric menorah, symbolizing the sixth day of Hanukkah.
And no, we don't have a Hanukkah bush in our house. No such thing.
You know, I actually liked what you wrote yesterday. And then today, you ruined it.
ReplyDeleteI haven't seen the episode of "The Goldbergs" yet, and I don't read the Facebook page about the show, so I won't comment about your analysis of the plot.
As assimilated American Jews, our collective experience is different from the experience of other Diaspora Jews, as well as Jews who live in Israel. The Christmas/Chanukah cultural debate started before either of us was born. That's why Adam Sandler's Chanukah song, in all its incarnations, is so popular, it hits on a very real issue. I found this article from 2008 about Chanukah in pop culture to be interesting. http://content.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1868359,00.html
Ad yes, the Chanukah Bush is "real", I know at least two people who had one when they were growing up. Is it kosher? No, it's not. I even got into an argument with my ex when he put one up in his house for our children. But it's a reaction to a feeling of isolation, of wanting to fit in with the fabric of American life. All immigrant groups deal with that issue in some way, but I think it's a bigger issue for us than for many other groups.
I reads an article in the Atlantic just the other day about the issue. I suspect you will agree with some of it, but not all of it. the first paragraph is somewhat insulting, but later he makes so interesting points. Here's the link. http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2015/12/hanukkah-sucks-amirite/419649/
In fact, I just added the Ashton book (referred to in the article) to my nook, it sounds fascinating.
But here's the thing. You don't "debate". You argue, harangue, condescend and insult. And then you become righteously indignant when called out on your attitude, and claim you're being persecuted for speaking your mind. How many times have you said it, how many times have you claimed Facebook is "the wild West" after you've had an unpleasant encounter in one of your Facebook groups?
If Barbara Goldberg felt the need to put you in your place, you probably did overstep your bounds.
I never overstepped my boundaries. I brought up some valid points, and funny, non-Jews were the ones who didn't get insulted, Jews did. And I could say more about your personal experience, but I won't. And sorry, you can create a Hanukkah bush, actually have one, say it is real ... but it isn't. I don't see non-Jews creating Christmas menorahs, so I don't see the need for a Hanukkah bush. And the mom's name is Beverly, by the way, and by justifying her son's claim--that Hanukkah is a dark, cold, boring holiday--I think she and he did a bit of damage. If this is the only thing you see about Hanukkah--and for many people, it will be--this was just plain wrong, and could have been handled quite differently, but wasn't because that is the point they wanted to get across. I fully get that, but I don't have to agree with them or like it, do I?
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